It is largely unknown to players and followers of the modern game that rugby started off purely as a contest for forwards in opposition in line-outs, scrums, rucks and mauls. This pitted eight men of statuesque physique, supreme fitness and superior intelligence in packs against one another. In those days, the winner was the pack that won the most set pieces. The debasement of the game began when backs were introduced. This occurred because a major problem was where to locate the next scrum or line-out. Selecting positions on the ground for these had become a constant source of friction and even violence.

The problem was resolved by employing forward rejects, men of small stature and limited intelligence, to run aimlessly around within the field of play. Following a set piece, the ball would be thrown to one of them, who would establish the next location either by dropping it or by throwing it to another reject for dropping. Very occasionally, a third reject would receive the ball before it would be dropped, and crowds would wildly cheer on these rare occasions. Initially these additional players were entirely disorganized but with the passing of time they adopted set positions.

For instance, take the half-back. He was usually one of the smallest and least intelligent of the backs whose role was simply to accept the ball from a forward and to pass it on to one of the other rejects who would drop it, providing the new location for the forwards to compete. He could easily (given his general size) have been called a quarter forward or a ball monkey but then tolerance and compassion are the keys to forward play and the present euphemism was decided on.

The five-eighth plays next to the half-back and his role is essentially the same except that when pressured, he usually panics and kicks the ball. Normally, he is somewhat taller and slightly better built than the half-back and hence his name. One-eighth less and he would have been a half-back, three-eighths more and he might well have qualified to become a forward.

The centres were opportunists who had no expertise but wanted to share in the glamour associated with forward packs. After repeated supplication to the forwards for a role in the game they would be told to get out in the middle of the field and wait for instructions. Thus, when asked where they played, they would reply “in the centre”. And they remain to this day, parasites and scroungers who mostly work as lawyers or used car dealers.

You may ask, why wingers? The answer is simple. Because these were players who had very little ability and were the lowest in the backline pecking order, they were placed as far away from the ball as possible. Consequently, and because the inside backs were so diligent in their assigned role of dropping the ball whenever they received it, the main contribution to the game made by the winger was not to get involved. Their instructions were to run away as quickly as possible whenever trouble appeared, and to avoid tackles at all costs. The fact that the game was organised so that the wingers didn’t get to touch the ball led to an incessant flow of complaints from them and eventually the apt description “whingers” was applied. Even though the “h” dropped off over the years, the whingeing itself unfortunately has not.

Lastly, the full-back. This was the position given to the worst handler, the person least able to accept or pass the ball, someone who was always in the way. The name arose because the forwards would understandably become infuriated by the poor play invariably demonstrated by that person, and call out “send that fool back”. He would then be relegated well out of everyone’s way to the rear of the field.

So there you have it. Let’s return to the glory days of a contest between two packs of eight men of statuesque physique, supreme fitness and superior intelligence. The rest can go off to where they will be happier – playing soccer.

(Received via What Brendan Learnt Today)

Posted via email from What I Learnt Today

See the full gallery on Posterous

500 steps ….Straight up Kings Canyon.
Plus a 7 hour drive to Alice.
Brendan, you would have been proud of my 4WD expertise on the dirt back roads – right up to the point where I had to ask the toothless fellow traveller from Toowoomba how to open the fuel tank.

Posted via email from What I Learnt Today

See the full gallery on Posterous

Uluru Base Walk. 10.7 km

Kata Tjinta ‘Valley of the Winds’ 4.7km

Walk to Outback Pioneer Pub 700m

Walk home from Outback Pioneer Pub. ??

Posted via email from What I Learnt Today

See the full gallery on Posterous

Posted via email from What I Learnt Today

Allan Stewart gained his first degree, in Dentistry, from Sydney University in 1936.

In 2006, at the age of 91, he gained his 3rd degree, in Law, and thus entered the Guiness Book of World Records as the oldest University graduate ever.

And today, at Southern Cross Univerity, in Lismore, at the age of 97 years and 58 days, he again took to the podium. He received a Masters Degree in Clinical Science,  and delivered the graduate address to his fellow students.

He told the The Northern Star:

“I think I can hang up my mortar board and academic robes after this one – although I said that after my last degree and then I got bored. I have so much time on my hands these days and I like to keep mentally active,”

However, Mr Stewart is modest: “Oh, it’s nothing really… I have just been blessed with good genes,” he said.

He attributes his vitality to fitness of mind, body, purpose, spirit and social fitness.

Posted via email from What I Learnt Today

Posted via email from What I Learnt Today

Posted via email from What I Learnt Today

Posted via email from What I Learnt Today

I like the way that ANZAC day is commemorated in the Northern Rivers. I suspect it is similar in many country towns.

The bravery and sacrifice of past and current military are of course central to the day. As happens everywhere, the marches in Alstonville, Lismore and Ballina are lead by our verterans. Some of our current service men and women march behind.

See the full gallery on Posterous

But the march has also become a celebration of all those people who belong to the other groups that

contribute to our community. Many of these ‘civilian’ marchers spend the whole year sacrificing their time in the service of others.

So today cheer on the SES volunteers, the Surf Life Savers and the Rural Fire Brigade. The Ballina Brass Band is inside a catte truck! There goes the Community Service Clubs, endlessly raffling and sizzling to raise money to build new facilities for the cmmunity. The Scouts and Girl Guides, and the Navy and Air Force Cadets are marching in time – well, almost in time – under the watchful eyes of the men and women who lead teach each week.  And give a special loud clap to the Indigenous Sporting and Support Groups.

Here come the residents of the nursing home, passing along the route in buses- some of them are waving their Australian flags, and those who can’t are helped by the wonderful nurses who look after them. They need a specially loud cheer.

And finally each of the schools and pre-schools march along behind their school captians – the special banners held high. They look quite the part in their uniforms. All the High School and Primary Schools – Government, Catholic, Christian – together in one parade. Its hard to pick out any particular little ones among the crowd – so better take a photo of all of them.

Many of the children wear the medals that belonged to great grandpa or grandma. A special day to be proud of our elders.

Join with your neighbours to line the streets, clap and cheer. Take the opportunity to thank all those people who help us. And then its over. Only thirty minutes! Now that’s a morning well spent.

Some criticise Anzac day as a celebration of war. I know that my father and uncle, like many others who served in WW2, preferred not to remember so publicly. I don’t believe they ever marched.

However, it seems to me that Anzac Day has become unique in the calendar as a celebration of connectedness. We feel connected with our parents and grandparents who lived through WW1 and WW2 and somehow still made good lives for themselves and for us. And we feel connected with the all those people who form our own communities – from the residents of our nursing homes to the little ones just starting school.

I like it like that.

Lest we forget.

Posted via email from What I Learnt Today

2 sodium atoms walk into in a bar.

One says to the other: “I think I’ve lost an electron”.

“Are you sure?”

“Yes, I’m positive”

Hat Tip @dianthusmed via Twitter

Posted via email from What I Learnt Today